February 28, 2014

I Will Survive

The Winter of my Discontent

Greetings to anybody who might still be out there.
It's me... Tank.

 I'm still alive. The beastly frigid temps persist, but they haven't done me in. The mountains of snow that required me to poop in the street didn't crush my spirit. The ice that lasted for weeks finally made me appreciate my short legs when all 4 of them gave out at once. I've coped reasonably well with an erratic walking schedule forced upon me by recent unfortunate events. The raging eye infection that I had last fall is back with a vengeance... apparently caused by prescription eye drops! 
Cujo is in da house.

Perhaps I should start at the beginning. 2014 has not been kind.

New Year's Day
My assistant came down with what would later be determined was the FLU.  The old guy was sick as well, so I was basically on my own. I couldn't reach my bag of food so it's a wonder I didn't starve to death, but I digress. About 4 days into the FLU, my asst. passes out on the kitchen floor. Oh, face first by the way. Ouchie. Then she developed pnemonia. Good grief. The old guy sounded like he was trying to cough up a squirrel every few minutes.  I'm not very good with calenders or time, but I'm pretty sure this lasted a LONG DAMN TIME.

And then... Alleluia!
Finally! My world starts to get back to normal.

It's February. The weather has NOT improved and it's getting tiresome. However, during my much abbreviated morning walk one day, I felt the leash giving me more slack than usual. Holy cow!! I'm FREE! I'm FREE! I started to run all over... first in one yard, then in another. Bushes and trees that I had never been allowed to approach were finally mine! I claimed them all with wild abandon! 

Then I noticed my asst. sprawled out on the street... WTH? Why would she just decide to plop herself on the street like that? How odd. Then I saw her trying to crawl. I had never seen this before and wondered if she had been whacked with a metal baton (I had recently seen the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan story on TV.) Hmmm... not seeing any suspects lurking about, I channeled Lassie and resumed running all over the neighborhood trying to get help for my fallen assistant (that's my story and no lengthy interrogation or peanut buttery bribe will get me to say otherwise.)

She eventually got herself back home and... good dog that I am... I also returned to offer whatever help I could. Sadly, she had slipped on the ice and sustained a major owie which has caused her to become quite useless.
(Many thanks to those of you who have sent her get well wishes.) 

Boredom has led to checking my food bowl throughout the day... it's empty as usual.

Maybe I can find a crumb.


My assistant in happier times...

You know that groundhog who predicts 6 more weeks of winter every #$@# year?
 I say we form a posse and take him out.
You in?